Saturday, 20 November 2010

Day 56

New Cross is a South London district which earns its money entirely from dozens of identical hair salons and feeds exclusively on fried chicken. I still have no idea how to tell the different districts/boroughs/things of London apart. Signposts? Definitely not, there’s none of those here. So when I walked out of New Cross today I judged that I had by noting that the trail of chicken bones had stopped.

I walked to Tower Bridge simply to prove that it is “within walking distance”. It is. Kind of. It was about four miles. This mainly took place along the Old Kent Road, whose churches, factories, people and schools are all too dangerous to stand up properly. I sold it for £60 in Monopoly money and then made it to the Thames, where I ogled HMS Belfast for a while and had an incredibly annoying epiphany about a script.

So how DO you tell the bits of London apart? Today I walked through Lewisham, Southwark, Peckham and the City of London. But then... what’s New Cross? It’s in Lewisham. But it’s not a road. It’s a thing. Within a thing. So what is it? I’m going to have to ask some of my Londoners these things. I also intend to ask how to pronounce Southwark. And I want to know if Crystal Palace is REALLY a crystal palace. And if the elephant is INSIDE the castle or if they’re just side by side. And how do the people of Surrey open the door into Surrey if their Quays are all the way in London?

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